You know that image of the swan, all serenity on top but paddling madly beneath the surface? That's a pretty good analogy for my state of mind these days.
Next week my sister leaves for New Zealand for a year to eighteen months and though I wasn't dwelling on it consciously, it was really churning up my sub-conscious!
For the last four or five days all my dreams have been about travelling with MissAmused (sis) in obscure places and uncomfortable circumstances. I think the recurring theme of discomfort is clearly my mind bracing itself to missing her a whole heck of a lot.
I'm flying home in the morning - a prospect over which I would normally be 'cock-a-whoop', but this time I'm feeling so apathetic I can hardly bring myself to pack. Something I generally excel at and revel in.
There is a point to all this whining, I promise! What I have come to realise is that my discomfort is mostly due to the fact that MissAmused has never been this far from home for so long before. She is setting off on an exhilarating, terrifying and wonderful adventure and I can't be beside her to make sure everything is as perfect as can be. I am going to have to stand back, hand her over to the Lord and trust that he will shelter her even better than I could.
I said yesterday that I thought this Lent would be about discerning my path. Now I think it will be much more about handing my loved ones over to God. I reckon it's something I'll have to re-do on a daily basis.
Lots of rosary decades will be used up for this one!
Next week my sister leaves for New Zealand for a year to eighteen months and though I wasn't dwelling on it consciously, it was really churning up my sub-conscious!
For the last four or five days all my dreams have been about travelling with MissAmused (sis) in obscure places and uncomfortable circumstances. I think the recurring theme of discomfort is clearly my mind bracing itself to missing her a whole heck of a lot.
I'm flying home in the morning - a prospect over which I would normally be 'cock-a-whoop', but this time I'm feeling so apathetic I can hardly bring myself to pack. Something I generally excel at and revel in.
There is a point to all this whining, I promise! What I have come to realise is that my discomfort is mostly due to the fact that MissAmused has never been this far from home for so long before. She is setting off on an exhilarating, terrifying and wonderful adventure and I can't be beside her to make sure everything is as perfect as can be. I am going to have to stand back, hand her over to the Lord and trust that he will shelter her even better than I could.
I said yesterday that I thought this Lent would be about discerning my path. Now I think it will be much more about handing my loved ones over to God. I reckon it's something I'll have to re-do on a daily basis.
Lots of rosary decades will be used up for this one!
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